


this fire grows high

by Crykea



Series: Bad Things Happen Bingo [8]
Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Bad Things Happen Bingo, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Melanie is bad at dealing w peoples emotions sometimes and thats facts just listen to mag100, Panic Attacks, georgie experiences A Single Fear au, magnus archives needs more femslash!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-03
Updated: 2019-05-03
Packaged: 2020-02-16 11:38:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18690730
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Crykea/pseuds/Crykea
Summary: Georgie sees someone she hasn't in a while.





	this fire grows high

**Author's Note:**

> One of these days im going to finish these bad things happen bingos and then its all gonna b over for u bitches (i have…………….i very long wip list…………….the majority of which is tma related in a big way)

One would think that after months of being aware of the actual dealings of the Magnus Institute, Georgie Barker would expect the worst at least  _ some _ of the time _. _ However, the biggest part of her continuously tried to always look on the bright side. She stood by there not being any point to getting upset over things she couldn’t change, and while anger was normal and something she allowed herself (often enough), she didn’t tend to stay angry or sad for long. There was too much in the world that excited her. She couldn’t understand how someone would be able to run a ghost podcast and experience what she had in life and think that the world was boring in any way. There was always something to be interested in.

 

Of course she got angry. Of course she got sad. In the many months that Melanie and her had been together, she had been there for her through both physical and emotional hurt, and in turn, Melanie returned the favour. She wasn’t the best listener, too preoccupied with trying to solve and fix, but she stayed the night hugging her when night the Admiral had a scare and was rushed to the vet. She distracted her to keep her from the computer upon the release of a new episode when the first couple hate rolled in. There weren’t ever many, but there was a weird amount of men who thought it was alright to yell at her from behind a screen because “women didn’t belong in the ghost industry”. Whatever that meant, truly. 

 

That was to say, the fact that she couldn’t feel fear did not make her emotionally flat. She was just as passionate a person as before, though of course, she had changed since that night in university. Facing death herself hadn’t stopped her from being a bubbly extravert, it had, if nothing after the first year of adjusting, just made her  _ more. _ She was still herself, but now she was more daring. She was of course not suddenly some sort of daredevil, seeking out dangerous experiences for some sort of adrenaline rush since she couldn’t feel the fear, but she was less likely to let people take advantage of her. There was no longer any accompanying fear of rejection. The fear of the future didn’t hold her back. Deciding to do what made her happy didn’t seem incredibly daring, but if she had told past her that she was the host of a popular podcast living in London with a cat and her girlfriend? She would have never believed herself. 

 

Still, not a day passed that she didn’t think of that night in the medical sciences building in some way.

 

Melanie didn’t entirely know what had happened to Georgie in the same way that Georgie didn’t know the full story behind the bullet wound in Melanie’s leg. The two of them were fine with that. Sometimes privacy was a good thing, and nowadays keeping things to themselves was starting to feel a bit freeing. Melanie knew that Georgie didn’t really dream. She knew that she was wrapped up in all of This in some way, she couldn’t feel fear, and that she rarely dreamt. She didn’t ask about the nightmares, something for which Georgie was grateful. That being said, Georgie rarely reacted to the dream. Was it a proper nightmare if it didn’t scare her? She wasn’t sure, but sometimes she’d kiss Melanie awake anyways just to feel alive-- to distract herself.

 

The women had fallen asleep tangled up, Melanie mostly lying on top of her. Even though she didn’t know much about what happened whilst Melanie was in India, she gathered that the injury she got was related to how angry she was now. Georgie was okay with Melanie taking the reins every once in a while. She liked being roughhoused a bit anyway. It wasn’t as though Melanie hurt her by any means, though she had caught wind of the knives she kept in her work desk. She’d had a strong talking to her after that story came out.

 

Around three in the morning, Georgie’s eyes flew open in a familiar way. Her limbs wouldn’t move, partly due to Melanie still lying on top of her, but also due to the usual sleep paralysis that came with that dream. The supposed ghost of the dead women from that night stood at the end of the bed, somehow near and far at the same time. If she could move, she would roll her eyes.

 

One ghostly hand drifted closer to Melanie’s ankle as though reaching out to touch her all while apparently not moving. She didn’t even know how she would react to this anymore if she could feel fear. The dream only stood to make her feel irritated after the number of times she had relived it in her sleep’ the woman’s words echoing in her ear…

 

She released herself from her paralysis with an angry huff that ruffled Melanie’s fringe, making the shorter woman scrunch up her nose and twitch in her sleep. Her elbow dug into Georgie’s side, making her yelp and push Melanie off of her. Her girlfriend awoke, hands immediately reaching for the nightstand for a weapon that wasn’t there. Georgie had a “knives in the bedroom” rule ever since the night that Melanie had startled awake and ripped open a pillow before opening her eyes. 

 

“What’s happening? What’s going on?” Melanie said groggily, the sleep in her voice lowering it to a husky grumble. Georgie leaned over into her space, eyeing the alarm clock as she did so. It was far too early to be awake. Her nails dug in as she dragged her hands down the meat of Melanie’s thighs, getting the woman’s attention and watching her pupils darken.

 

“It was just a dream, there’s nothing to worry about. Let’s go back to sleep.”

 

“Your dreams don’t usually wake me up, though. Why’d you push me?” Melanie affected a hurt look, pouting slightly at Georgie. The pretend angst on her face wasn’t helped by how her cheeks were slightly flushed as Georgie continued to dig her nails into her legs. She knew the slight pain was something Melanie liked, and she was always more than happy to indulge her.

 

“It was self defense, your honour, I swear!” Georgie smacked the back of her hand on her forehead dramatically, making Melanie snort and pull her in for a kiss, “You elbowed me in the ribs” she said after a moment, laughing as she kissed Melanie’s nose.

 

“Did not.”

 

“Tell that to the bruise I’m gonna have in the morning.” Georgie yawned before pressing another chaste kiss to the corner of Melanie’s mouth, tugging at her bare forearms, “Come back here.”

 

Melanie looked at her softly, or as soft as Melanie looked at anything, and lay back down next to Georgie. She pulled Georgie over protectively, hugging her to her chest. Her blunt fingernails scraped gently against Georgie’s scalp, probably tangling her already easily knotted curls beyond help, but that was a problem for future Georgie. She kissed Melanie’s collarbone once before sleep overtook her again, this time peacefully quiet until Melanie’s alarm went off in the morning.

 

Georgie shut it off for her so that Melanie wouldn’t crack her screen even more. There were only so many times a woman could throw a phone at a wall before she needed to buy a new phone, truly. She stretched and yawned, already having forgotten the dream from last night. Throwing on Melanie’s t-shirt and a pair of underwear, she padded into the kitchen, leaving Melanie to sleep in a bit. With the stories she heard second hand about the goings-ons of the Institute, she really thought Melanie could use the sleep. She didn’t even really have to be in for three hours. It was still unclear to her why Melanie always set her alarm for six if she hated getting up early and didn’t have to anyways.

 

Busying herself in the kitchen, she brewed a strong pot of coffee for the two of them and made breakfast. For a moment as she measured out coffee grounds, she considered just throwing the leftovers from their take away into the microwave but eventually decided against it, feeling a bit domestic. Eggs and toast were easy enough to prepare, and by the time she had plated the food and poured two mugs of coffee, her girlfriend’s arms were snaking their way around her waist. Her nose was cold when she pressed it against the back of Georgie’s neck and gently bit the skin there. Georgie laughed and swatted the woman with a towel, playfully, enjoying the way she could feel Melanie’s grin against her, and the way Melanie’s arms tightened around her waist minutely before letting her go.

 

“No more of that! I made us breakfast. Plus, we both still need to shower.” Georgie laughed more as Melanie waggled her eyebrows at the mention of a shower. The two of them ate in comfortable silence, Melanie, still tired from having just woken up, and Georgie thinking about their plans for the day. The two of them had decided to meet for lunch together, and before they did so, Georgie had quite a bit of editing to do. She had decided to record a chunk of podcasts in one go so that she would feel more prepared come release time but had yet to edit any of the files on her computer. 

 

She washed the dishes as Melanie showered. Returning the favour, Melanie took care of the Admiral when she got out, allowing Georgie time to get herself ready. Melanie brought her a towel when she stepped out of the shower, making Georgie stand still as she towelled her dry, pushing at her shoulders every time she tried to lean down to steal a kiss. 

 

After both of them were ready, they got in Georgie's car so that she could drop Melanie off at the Institute. Afterwards, she took herself to a nearby cafe about a block away to do some work. There wasn’t any point in driving all the way back to her flat to edit when she was just going to need to come back to pick up Melanie in a few hours. Before getting out of the car, Melanie had leaned over the centre console, burying her fingers into Georgie’s curls, and pressing a heated kiss against Georgie’s lips. She’d winked as she’d closed the car door, leaving Georgie blushing furiously and looking forward to lunch even more than before.

 

The cafe down the block was lively, the invigorating scent of coffee drifting through the air, waking Georgie up even further as she sat down with her computer. General chatter from the surrounding patrons permeated her headphones, adding a nice lull that helped her focus on the task at hand. It had taken a long time for Georgie to get used to hearing her own voice through her headphones, and even after years, a part of her couldn’t help overanalyzing the way she said certain words in her retelling of the story of an old haunted theatre in Bournemouth. She was still trying to convince Melanie to join guest on the podcast to no avail as of yet.

 

After what felt like a few minutes, but had evidently been closer to four hours, the screen of Georgie’s phone lit up, displaying a text over top of her wallpaper photo of the Admiral. It seemed that time had gotten away from her again whilst she was editing. She tapped out a quick text back to Melanie, telling her where to find her, before starting to save her files, glad that her computer hadn’t crashed as she hadn’t saved at all yet. An upbeat song about young love was playing softly over the din of conversation in the cafe when she slid her headphones from her ears. Behind the counter, a new tray of pastries was being placed in the display case, making Georgie’s mouth water and her stomach growl.

 

At the same time as Georgie’s eyes caught sight of Melanie walking down the street towards her, her eyes caught a slight movement out of the corner of her eye. A strange feeling overcame her as her eyes locked with those of a woman on the opposite side of the busy cafe. She had seemingly just sat down with a steaming mug clasped in her hands. Georgie’s hands, having just finished slotting things into her messenger bag, began to tremble. It felt like she couldn’t look away from the woman. As though from kilometres away, Georgie heard the bell ring over the door to the cafe. She knew she should look to greet Melanie, but her eyes were stuck on the woman.

 

She was familiar in a way that took Georgie a moment to fully comprehend. She was thin in a sickly way and pale with short cropped blonde hair. An emotionless expression was frozen on her gaunt face. Her hands looked strangely thin, with long sharp looking nails. From across the room, Georgie could see that the pads of the woman’s thumbs, which were pressed to the mug in front of her, were wrinkled as though the moisture had been sucked out of them. On top of that, there was something wrong with her eyes. The cafe wasn’t brightly lit by any means, but the lack of shine in the woman’s cold grey eyes was still strange with how she was facing the store window. The light covered her and lit her up like a spotlight, showing off her sunken cheeks, but did not bring any life to her eyes. They were too foggy, almost clouded over, with the red of her veins too prominent. They were unnatural, and yet familiar. The isolated feeling of her diaphragm fluttering with her quickening breath alerted her that something was truly wrong. This hadn’t happened in years-- This wasn’t supposed to happen  _ at all _ anymore. She had only seen eyes like that once before…

 

The image of the dead woman from that night superimposed itself over the woman. No that still wasn’t quite right. The sounds of the cafe around her disappeared in entirety so that all Georgie could hear was her own pounding heart. Unable to blink, Georgie watched through watery eyes as the woman’s mouth slowly stretched into a painfully familiar smile. She always was smiling back then.

 

“Alex?” Her voice was croaky as it punched itself through the phantom feeling of hands wrapped around her throat, constricting her breathing. The woman squinted her dead eyes at her, smile still firmly set in place. Her brain rapidly flashed through memory after memory, all including that same smiling face as she felt her breath come in somehow shorter gasps. Hands gripped at Georgie’s wrists almost painfully.

 

\---

 

“Georgie!” Melanie said in a loud whisper, not willing to shout and draw undue attention, but trying desperately to break through to her girlfriend. Following her gaze, she saw a woman holding Georgie’s gaze with a smile that lacked expression. She felt her hackles raise and red flooded her vision. Her hands itched to grab something sharp that she could bury in the smiling woman’s chest. There wouldn’t be any life to watch drain from her eyes if the familiar whine that accompanied entities meant anything, which wouldn’t be  _ as _ satisfying, but if she’d hurt Georgie in any way she would... 

 

She took a deep breath, closed her eyes, and counted to ten. She didn’t have time for that right now. Georgie’s breath hiccuped as tears flooded quietly down her face. If Melanie didn’t know any better-- and she was starting to think she didn’t-- she would say that there was terror in her girlfriend’s voice as she repeatedly whispered a name through teary, short breaths. Swearing, she knelt in front of Georgie’s knees, pulling her hands down in between them. 

 

She had never been good at this sort of stuff, even before India. She wasn’t even allowed to take statements direct from subject anymore after the number of traumatized people she’d accidentally sent away just by virtue of being bad at comforting. But she knew Georgie, and she’d helped her before-- mind, she hadn’t helped with anything like  _ this _ before, but she could try her best. Georgie’s breath was still coming in little gasps. She really needed to get her out of the building-- to get her away from that  _ thing. _

 

She stood back up and gently coaxed Georgie into standing alongside her, murmuring awkward praises as she did so. This shouldn’t be so hard, but Melanie couldn’t help it. There was no easily fixable solution to fear besides to fight back or run away, and at the moment fighting wasn’t an option if she wanted to keep herself between Georgie and the smiling thing. They needed to get out. They needed to get out or Melanie was going to vault over the counter and nab the sharpest thing she could find. The strap of Georgie’s messenger bag slid over her shoulder along with Georgie’s arm so that Melanie could support her. Walking to the door was a bit of a task. A few people had turned to stare upon seeing the tears on Georgie’s face but most looked away when the heat of Melanie’s rage-filled gaze landed on them. 

 

\---

 

Georgie didn’t come back to herself properly until a while after Melanie had sat the two of them down on the grass under a tree. She had taken her to a park a few blocks away in the car and laid her down so that her head was in Melanie’s lap. The hand in her hair stilled when Georgie tilted her head up to look at her. Behind her glasses, Melanie’s black eyes seemed somehow darker. The glare in her eyes still lingered from when she had found Georgie in the cafe. She knew it wasn’t directed at her of course. One of her eyebrows was raised in silent question, unspoken either out of discomfort on Melanie’s part or as an attempt to give Georgie space.  _ So what was that? I thought you couldn’t feel fear? Who was the woman? How was I supposed to deal with that? _

 

A puff of air escaped Georgie’s mouth in a sigh, and she winced at the pain in her dry throat, “That was Alex.” She started, voice raw. There was a wavering uncertainty in her voice that came with not quite understanding what had actually happened, and even more, whether or not she wanted to unpack it.

 

“Alex.”

 

“A...friend from university.”

 

“You didn’t seem too excited to see her.” Melanie’s glare hadn’t lessened, though Georgie could tell the heat in her gaze didn’t have to do with anything Georgie had done.

 

“I suppose I wasn’t.” She said, not sharply. She didn’t want to think about it yet. Some time would be good. Melanie’s expression changed, softening slightly at the corner of her mouth.

 

“Fair enough.”

 

\---

 

The conversation wasn’t brought up again for weeks, and when it was Georgie couldn’t help but feel like she could have chosen a better time. Melanie and her were back in bed, Melanie drifting off from where she had collapsed once again on top of Georgie. One of Georgie’s hands was petting idly at Melanie’s short dark hair, lost in thought. 

 

“What’s it like to be scared?” She blurted out, tone soft enough that Melanie probably didn’t hear what she’d said-- she almost hoped Melanie hadn’t heard what she’d said. She didn’t know if she really wanted to open that can of worms. Although she wasn’t moving previously, Melanie stills.

 

A moment passed in silent consideration.

 

“I think it’s a bit different than how it was before. But not? Does that make sense?” Melanie’s voice took on a serious tone. She breathed out a puff of hot air against Georgie’s collarbone and Georgie hummed in acknowledgement, “I’ve always been pretty okay at working through being afraid though to get the job done. D’you remember that Sarah Baldwin girl you recommended to me back when I was still with Ghost Hunt UK? Watched her peel the skin off her arms one night in an abandoned hospital and could only really feel frustrated that the footage got corrupted. In the moment it was kind of like, I don’t know, getting cold suddenly? My vision would tunnel and I might feel a bit faint, but if there was a task at hand, I couldn’t just slough it off. I guess I’ve just always been quite good at compartmentalizing. What’s brought this on then?”

 

“I don’t really remember what it’s like to feel fear. Haven’t felt it in a long time till that day in the cafe. I was curious.” Georgie sighed, still tangling her fingers in Melanie’s hair and massaging her scalp.

 

“Yeah. Alex was her name, right? I’m not going to ask if you don’t want me to, but you aren’t the only one curious.”

 

“I was close with her in university before I met Jon.”

 

“...Alright. So what brought on the reaction then?”

 

“She’s-- I-- Alex was--” Georgie stammered, no nerves in her voice but mostly shaking confusion, “Alex died. At least I’m pretty sure she died? I don’t really-- I never really saw what happened to her after she… lied down. But I haven’t felt fear since then. I don’t think I’m supposed to be able to be afraid until I die? Which raises some questions, I think.”

 

“Ah” Melanie started, dragging one hand up to caress Georgie’s neck, “I’m pretty sure you’re alive though. I mean, I can feel your pulse. And you’ve always been cold but it definitely seemed like your blood was pumping a few minutes ago.” Georgie tugged Melanie’s hair at the roots, huffing out a small laugh.

 

“Hush you.” Georgie smiled.

 

“Make me?” 

 

Georgie flipped the two of them over, one arm tugging Melanie up by the waist, and the other straight out beside Melanie’s head. She pulled her into a heated kiss, making Melanie groan. There was certainly more than one way to prove she was alive.

**Author's Note:**

> yooo my main blog is crykea and my podcast one is alicedaisytonner
> 
> tma is kicking my ass out of imposter syndrome by making me write so much fic


End file.
